In case you missed part one of the story
I am not a product of a broken home, but there were times that I wished I were, for my mother’s sake. For a long time, she was the unhappiest tormented soul I knew until she found her place in God. In talking about the insidious attacks of the enemy against manhood, it might escape the attention of a few, but many families are breaking apart. I am not an expert in these matters and I don’t pretend to be. My aim here is to share my experience and the lessons I have learned.
I am not a product of a broken home, but there were times that I wished I were, for my mother’s sake. For a long time, she was the unhappiest tormented soul I knew until she found her place in God. In talking about the insidious attacks of the enemy against manhood, it might escape the attention of a few, but many families are breaking apart. I am not an expert in these matters and I don’t pretend to be. My aim here is to share my experience and the lessons I have learned.
A huge part of my growing years was
spent watching my mother hold the home together, she stretched herself thin
trying to make sure that her children had the semblance of a home and it was heartbreaking to watch.
As the first child, I experienced
upfront, the violence and abuse that went on her relationship with my father
and it exposed me to the toxic narrative that has birthed the generation of men
that we see in our current day.
These are men who feel entitled to the
body and life of a woman.
Men who believe that a woman exists only
to lose herself so that they find themselves
Men who believe that childbearing,
child-rearing and home managing are all women are good for.
Men who especially in our day,
ironically, believe that the woman should do everything including work while
they can take a self-proclaimed vacation because, you know, a woman is
superwoman, she is meant to be stretched.
The toxic narrative has not left women
unscathed.
It tells that them the success of a home
depends on them and this narrative often draws its justification from
scripture, the most commonly taken from Proverbs 14;1, “A wise woman builds her home,
but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hands.”
In reading the scripture, I often ask
myself, why no one asks the question, “what
is she building with?” Does she build with nothing in her hands? The
very use of the word “build” there implies that there are materials that she is
to work with. God was clear about the prototype of this relationship when he
created Adam in a fully functional environment with resources and appointed him
to work, then brought
him a wife.
The danger of this narrative is that it
frees the man of any responsibility in the home and places what is meant to be
shared responsibility squarely on the shoulders of the woman. I am bold to say
that this is an anomaly. And anyone who has stayed in the presence of God long
enough to touch him will know this to be true.
There have been prophecies of a shaking
that will start first from the house of God, his church. It has already begun,
and many are walking through fire that will not burn them and are in waters
that will not drown them. I sincerely believe that God is taking foundations
and turning them upside down. All that you know will be tested and the ultimate
goal is for his words revealed in us to remain for a foundation that is strong
and unshaken.
Many relationships will be affected by
this shaking, including marriages. Age-old narratives, that have become
strongholds and have birthed anomalies in the family structures are being
challenged. This is the age of God’s truth and it will prevail. The real
question now is whether we will allow ourselves to be refined by the fire?
Because allowing refinement will make the difference between the homes that
make it and the ones that don’t. And this refinement covers both the man and
the woman. Amos
3:3 asks, “Can
two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?”. The
days where the woman walked with God and served as a covering for the man are
over. That God
permits a thing does not mean that it is his divine will. (Ephesians
5:22.33, 1st Corinthians 11: 3)
Phew! That was intense!
So, back to how I finally called God
daddy.
During the period of the trial, I was in,
I prayed and asked God to lead me to gathering of his people where his word was
being taught in power and simplicity.
God answered my prayers and led me to a
church that has been unlike anything I have ever experienced.
Celebration church turned out to be the best thing
that happened to me this year.
Never have I been more eager to be in
God’s presence than now.
Never have I had the desire to hear the
Word being taught.
Attending the church made me understand
that when people are taught about their identity in Christ and the inheritance
we have in him, it can change lives. The gospel is indeed the power of God at
work to save everyone who believes (Romans
1:16)
I remember attending the service one day
and the person leading prayer was like,
“Go ahead and thank God, say thank you
daddy.”
Everything in me went “scrreeeeech!!!!”.
I was like, “Daddy ba wo?” Nah
bruh!
I call him “father”, it’s very regal,
very old English times and makes me feel like a little princess.
So, ignored him and the others after him
who would pray and say “thank you, Daddy".
I could not just relate.
Fast-forward to last night.
I was listening to a message on YouTube
by Pastor Iren called Jireh.
It's funny because I had just put my son
to sleep and laid down beside him with the message playing through my
earphones and I nodded off.
I woke up moments later to Pastor
Iren saying, “God has justified you”.
That simple? Not quite.
I had also heard him say that mankind
was corrupted in the garden of Eden by the decision of the first Adam and that
the only way God would have corrected that was to destroy mankind, something he
was not willing to do.
He made provision for our salvation
through his Son Jesus, to correct the flaw in mankind and clean up the mess it
had created for generations.
You see, I had always said and believed
this, but I had never heard anyone preach it.
Hearing Pastor Iren say that made me
realize that God has been teaching me his word in his way and it was not the
product of my imagination.
I felt loved and honoured by God.
I felt loved and honoured by God.
And in that moment, I said “thank you
Daddy”, and I meant it.
Calling him daddy, felt very simple,
very new ageish and made me feel like a little girl, period.
Do you see why I call him Daddy
now?
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